Today I Was Robbed on the Highway

Robbed by a Statist in a Fancy Costume

I was driving along the Interstate today, on my way to a Yoga class, when I noticed a Statist in a fancy costume on the side of the road. He had his car, decked out in symbology, parked at a weird angle on the shoulder of the road and he was standing about 20 feet off the road in the grass. He appeared to have coerced another driver into pulling over and likely robbed them, as is their custom. The whole situation looked a bit peculiar.

I went on my way, as there was nothing I could do about the situation. Then I looked in my mirror and saw that statist with its coercion lights on and closing in on me. Sure enough, that was his purpose. He had apparently run all the way back to his car and sped down the road to coerce me.

I pulled over, as is custom, and waited till he came to my vehicle. He eventually did come to the vehicle and tapped on the passenger side window. I rolled down the window and he informed me that I had just done something illegal. What was it? I had driven past him on the right lane, while he was robbing someone. I suppose the world simply must be made safe for robbery.

I later learned that in the many stacks of pages of legislation passed by the territorial monopoly called Alabama, a law was passed, that I apparently violated. I had hurt no other person and was quite mindful of his robbery and was in no danger of hitting him. Still, he decided to race all the way up the road, endangering all of the drivers along the way, to write me a ticket for something that did not involve me harming anyone else.

I looked into this law and apparently I am to pay $25 plus court costs, which tack on an additional $26. At the time, I asked the statist how much money he was confiscating from me and he was unaware. He simply pointed me back to the bureaucracy contact on the freshly printed ticket. I have also learned, that I will have to drive back to that county, which is at least 45 minutes away, to appear before a judge at 9AM, lest I be caged.

So… I guess try not to get anywhere near a statist or their robberies, or they will jump up from that robbery and proceed to rob you.